Learning From Those Who Have Gone Before Us

^"Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God."

Titus 2:3-5

 

^{As a mother, you expect love for your children and your family to come naturally and most days it does .  But there are those times when you have been stuck inside for days because of eleven inches of snow, everyone is bickering and just downright mean to each other, you are fresh out of creative ideas to keep five children occupied, you are pregnant, tired and weary, the kitchen is a mess, your baby boy has taken to climbing atop everything and trips to the E.R. flash through your mind, and their is yet another storm with more snow and possible power outages on the horizon.  It is hard to admit but those days the love doesn't come as naturally.  Titus 2 tells us that we need to learn to "love our husbands and children, to be self controlled and pure, busy at home, kind and subject to our husbands."  So it doesn't just come naturally and its not just me that has to work some days at loving my husband and children, controlling my temper and not yelling at my children (or my husband), not being lazy by sitting on the computer instead of cleaning my kitchen, and listening to my husband who only wants what is best for our family.  This passage talks about learning from the older women, who can teach us what is good.}
 

^{My grandparents raised six children in the very home we live in and we are currently pregnant with our sixth.  When my grandmother was still living, we only had two children and no aspiring dreams to become a large family.  If I had only known...I have a million questions for her now.  How she did it, what she did right and what she wished she had done differently.  I feel like a kindred spirit.  If only I had another moment with her so that she could teach me all of her tricks.  Now, when it is too late, I am ready to listen.  There are many moments in this old house when I feel her very presence and encouragement and I know that she is looking down from heaven and is proud of me.}
 

^{In church so many of the older ladies have been encouraging to us and our large family.  They often comment on how much they enjoy watching our parade.  They compliment when our children are well behaved and encourage when little ones squirm.  One special lady in particular has taken an interest in watching our family grow.  She raised six children of her own and I would expect that much of her advice would mirror that of my grandmothers.  Last week she shared some special words of wisdom as I and another mother stood and drank it all in.  She told me that these are the best days of my life and to cherish every moment with my children.  She told me that I would be very tired and that my husband should be tired too if he wasn't already.  She told me that my house would never be clean and that advice given to her was to buy dimmer light bulbs, which I think is an excellent idea.  In other words let it go.  Enjoy this time because it will be gone before we know it and we will be looking back at this time with fond memories.  So now I know...this is as good as it gets this side of Heaven.  I am going to work hard to learn to love my husband and children, to have self control and be pure, to work hard in my home, and to listen to my husband who works hard to raise this brood right alongside of me.  Even though it is hard to admit, I am becoming an older woman who also needs to encourage those younger mothers and teach them that love does not always come naturally and they are not alone in their struggles
. 
So today we tidy the house, put some more soup in the crock-pot, sip some more hot chocolate, play another board game, snuggle up to a good movie, and watch the snowfall again.  There will still be dirty diapers, arguing children, a dirty kitchen, and all of the chaos that large family life brings but this time, mommy will keep reminding herself  to cherish these moments with my babies because  a wise woman taught me that there is nothing better this side of heaven than our greatest blessings, our children.}

Happy Birthday Conner

Seven years ago today at 9:12 p.m. Conner was brought into this world by a very special lady, his birth mother.  As adoptive parents it feels a bit strange because we have no memories of that day, no stories to tell about his coming into this world.  On May 15, 2012 at six years old Conner and his sister were adopted into our family and although our journey, and his, has not always been easy we are blessed to be a part of his life.

I always have said Conner is one of the bravest kids I know.  Starting over at four and a half years old isn't easy and he has met each new experience head on with a smile and giggle.  Conner adores his siblings and loves all of our extended and church family.

We plan to take Conner out on a mommy and daddy only date to the restaurant of his choice, KFC, which brings back good memories from the days he spent with his birth mom. This will give him some special time with just us to celebrate his day and share old and make new memories.  Cake and Ice Cream will follow with the rest of the family along with a special gift.  We love you Conner and hope today is special.  Happy Birthday!!!!

Feast of St. Valentine

This week the kids and I studied the origins of Valentines day and counted down the days until our Feast of St. Valentine.  We focused on God's love for us and each day in February tore off a heart with a verse about love and read it as a family.

We spent the last few days making hearts, decorating and making plans for our feast.

Today we cooked, all day.  Each child had their hand in at least a few of the menu items.  Our menu was marinated grilled pork loin.  Our marinate consisted of oil, soy sauce, Worcestershire sauce, liquid smoke, balsamic vinegar, garlic powder, parsley, salt and pepper.  We marinated for about six hours.  My boys (Daddy and Payton) grilled and they were perfect.  Very Very Very yummy.  The kids even deliberated and said that they were better than my chicken strips which rate at the top of all time favorite meals and not one kid asked for ketchup (a staple at our house).  They were the star of the evening, even over sugar cookies!

Our salad had heart shaped carrots and cucumbers along with a copy cat Olive Garden Dressing.

 

Zwiebach, mashed potatoes, and green beans rounded out the meal served on mommy's barely used china and Great Grandma's table cloth with Valentine napkins.  Using things from my grandma on special occasions make me feel like she is still with us and I love that.

Dessert was heart shaped sugar cookies made and decorated by the kids.

We had a fun Valentines Day...cooking, learning, and working together.

Happy Feast of St. Valentine!

So Long Cable T.V. **SNIFFLE**

Growing up we lived most of our lives without cable.  Even then, we were in the minority in our neighborhood.  We had one T.V. and when that broke we went back to an old black and white that had to warm up for thirty minutes so that you could actually understand what they were saying and see the picture.  We only watched a few shows faithfully, Little House on the Prairie, The Cosby Show, and of course Dukes of Hazard.  We rented a big clunky VCR from the local grocery store so that we could watch Girls Just Wanna Have Fun for the twenty fifth time.  Life was good.

These days everyone has cable right?  We have had it for years and love the variety of entertainment that it provides but our family is addicted to cable t.v.  (or lovingly known as B.T. by the younger crowd).  Monte and I love to DVR our favorite shows and watch them after the kids go to bed.  The kids enjoy all of the educational and children's entertainment channels that cable has to offer.  We decided a few months back to try other options and turn off the cable.  We tried the other options but never turned it off. There was just not enough of the programming we liked.  We justify it because we don't spend a lot on other entertainment and (read a bit of sarcasm into this part) you know we work hard so we just plain deserve it.  Every time I call the cable company to ask them to turn it off they just offer me another discount of twenty to thirty dollars per month for a year.  One time she even upgraded us to an additional tier and knocked off money.   I am a sucker for a good deal and it worked every time.

The other day something happened.  Our basement flat screen mysteriously shattered.  We honestly have no idea what or who happened to it but it is definitely toast.  Monte and I mulled it over and decided maybe God was speaking to us.  First of all we don't NEED more than one T.V. in this house.  Secondly we are all watching it way to much.  There are many of the kids' shows that are not teaching the values or attitudes that we would like.  We have been way too complacent for too long and not been diligent with truly monitoring what they watch.  Yes we set limits but they are not limits that we are always completely comfortable with.  So many shows put down parental authority and include witchcraft and things we don't agree with.  Monte and I get very little done in the few hours before bed when we do have a little uninterrupted time without kids and honestly not all of our shows are that great either.  We should be more productive, especially with number six on the way.  It is time to turn off the cable.
By turning off the cable, these are the things we hope to accomplish:
1. Save money toward upcoming hospital bills.
2. Get some much needed projects done.
3. Spend some extra time with each other and each of the children before the baby comes.
4. Keep up with homeschool grading.
5. Read some good books.

So...here goes.  I made the call and they were oh so convincing (he reminded me that we had cable since 2003 YIKES). But this time I did not waiver.  To make myself feel better I did reassure the man on the other end that we would be back.  God gave us another sign last night that it was time.  When you are not in God's Will he will keep gently and sometimes not so gently nudging.  I am not waiting for something bad to happen...I think it is time to listen.  So...for those of you whom God is allowing to keep the cable, I am jealous. But, for us and for now, God is asking that we use our time and money differently (funny as I type this a bugle plays on one of the kids' shows, how fitting).  So out come the rabbit ears and a seven dollar subscription to Netflix's instant cue. **SNIFFLE**  TOGETHER WE WILL SURVIVE!

Crazy (with a side of six kids)

This last week we made the big announcement about expecting our sixth child.  It was interesting to watch people as they congratulated us.  Announcing number six is definitely a different story than announcing number one.  Everyone was so kind yet I know that many of you were thinking "they must be crazy" in the back of your minds and honestly I had braced myself for that moment when someone accidentally said it out loud.  You did well my dear friends.  I never heard it (out loud anyway but I did see it on a few of your faces). 

When we went to the doctors office for my first OB visit, even they weren't surprised to see us back.  The Physicians Assistant said "we stopped trying to guess who will be back and who won't, we just never know."  I wasn't told I was elderly or super high risk because of my "advanced maternal age" (39 going on 40).  In fact I was told that my risks were very minimal and that my previous healthy pregnancy less than two years ago was a good indicator of how this one would go.  In their eyes we are having our fourth.  None of the paperwork mentions two adopted children in the mix just three live healthy births.  When I reminded the PA that we also had two adopted children as well she was interested but not shocked.  During the course of my exam she asked where all of our children attended school.  When I told her that we homeschooled all I saw were two big round eyes peering at me over the drape.  "Oh my" she said, "Christa your hands are so FULL!"

I do have my hands FULL but my heart is FULL as well.  We have been so blessed by our unexpected journey.  We tried to hold onto control for so long and we finally just let go and said God it's yours, just let us know in your time what is next.  I am a control freak..do you know how hard that was for me?    But when we did, God blessed us over and over.  Not only with children but with financial stability that we still cannot explain and with a strong mostly happy marriage.  I say mostly because neither of us are perfect and neither is our marriage.

So here's the answers to some of your questions...
Was this planned?  The answer is yes...by God.  We obviously did not prevent it but with my past history of infertility we did not know the outcome.  A few months ago I met another foster mother about my age through craigslist (she was selling a double stroller). She introduced me to her oh so sweet, adorable, three month old foster son and I fell in love. I contacted our social worker and said that I was fairly certain that we would be back shortly, but that was my plan, not God's.
What do the other children think?  They are excited.  They adore our other little ones and are thrilled to welcome another child to "the club."  Actually, on adoption day when our Yukon broke down we ended up driving a fifteen passenger van to wichita for the day.  The kids were convinced that we "needed one of these so that we could have lots more kids."  They know that our love grows with each child and there is very little jealousy.
How are you going to homeschool with another little one?  Believe me there are many moms out there that do it.  I am not going to say that my confidence doesn't waiver but we will figure out how to make it work.  Daddy may be helping us catch up in the evening and we will homeschool all summer until the baby comes and take our break in August.  I have found that all of the kids have quickly gotten ahead on their studies and skills so we can afford a break and maybe a short while of disorganization until we get it figured out.
Do you have room for all those kids?  I guess that depends on how much room you think we all need.  My grandparents raised six children in our home and we have since added on a full basement with an additional family room, bathroom and bedroom (that we use as a family closet instead of a bedroom).  Luckily our bedrooms are large and bunk beds make them even roomier.  We actually have room for a few more hee hee!  Our Yukon has bucket seats in the middle row so it seats seven but we found out that a bench seat will fit by switching out a few bolts so that is our plan for now.
Are you CRAZY?  Yes, maybe a tad bit but we are ok with that (and so are our six kids).

The Announcement




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#6
Due August 7, 2013

 

 



Happy New Year

 

It is New Year's Eve.  Christmas is over.  The tree is down and the house is returning to a somewhat normal state (as normal as things get around here).  This New Year's Eve will be spent at home relaxing and watching the snow along with a movie or two with all of our little people. Another advantage of large family life is that we are our own party (never a dull moment).  Bentley got Princess Bride for Christmas and I have a feeling that everyone will love it.  We took a family trip to the store to buy all those fun snacks and appetizers that the rest of the year are off limits (even for mommy and daddy).    We pre-ordered wings online for daddy at Pizza Hut, a coveted treat.  Mommy was too lazy to make the mess of wings from scratch.  The babies tired bodies will fall asleep in the middle of our fun and being at home makes it easy for them to go to bed.  The older kids will pull out the sleeping bags and build forts in the basement with doors strategically placed so that they can watch t.v. until exhaustion overtakes them.  In reality no one will probably be awake long enough to ring in the New Year.  Monte and I are getting too old to care and the babies think sleeping in is overrated so they will be up early.  The New Year will still be here tomorrow and we can celebrate then with Yummy New Year's Cookies, and yes dad we will be over with some.  Hope you all have a wonderful evening and a Happy New Year!!